Now I know in part, but then I shall know, even as I am known. I will die and go to a better place over the water. I will fall knowing the people I love are safe. That on this wicked day, when I fall to my knees, I will fall knowing that the world has shifted that much closer to peace and goodness. I have to trust-so much trust-that this sacrifice has meaning. I still have to face a man I love and hate-a man who loves and hates me in return-and choose to lay down my life, hoping that everything I fought for, all the fragile peacetime work of a tired soldier, will still stand when I no longer can.

I still have to put on this armor I’ve chosen-cuff links, tie bar, flag pin-and I still have to pick up my weapons. Fuck fatalism, because it’s still a choice. They cry over me like they would cry over a body, and the boat cuts through the water like a knife, swift and smooth. And my mother, and Morgan, and strangely enough, Embry’s mother Vivienne. There is a boat there, and women, and there is someplace to go.

Mirror-still, glass-clear, fog wisping over the surface. Why this idea should fascinate me, I don’t know, but it does. That from the moment I took my first breath, the date and time of my last were already stitched into determined existence. This idea that our paths are pre-ordained by some external hand-by God or by the universe or by fate, or by some mixture of the three. THERE IS a certain fatalism in the old myths and legends that I’ve always relished. Now I know in part, but then I shall know fully, even as I am known now to God. When I became a man, I set aside childish ways.įor now we see through a glass, darkly but then we shall see face to face. When I was a child,I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned liked a child. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.įor Laurelin Paige, Melanie Harlow and Kayti McGee.

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